Tuesday, August 23, 2005

**MOJO** - Wrestling Stars of the 1980's Day 2

D-D-T! D-D-T! D-D-T!

One of the greatest heels of all time, Jake "the Snake" Roberts terrified his opponents with his pet python Damien. He was known for letting the snake wrap up his opponents following their defeat at the hands of his signature DDT. He may never have held a title, but he is still remembered as one of the more popular wrestlers of all time (even if he did have the atrocious "blindfold match" against "the Model" Rick Martel on his resume).

And much like today's starter David Wells, it is a well known fact that Jake the Snake and booze aren't exactly strangers. Which is why if you want some Jake the Snake mojo, look no further than the promo he delivered at the "Heroes of Wrestling" show in October of 1999 prior to his bout first Jim "the Anvil" Neidhart (transcription courtesy of R D Reynolds of Wrestlecrap).

"In a casino, you should gamble. Let me tell you something, Anvil, you don't want to play cards with me, because I'll cheat. Ok, I cheat. You want to play 21, I got 22. You want to play black jack? I got two of those too. You want to play aces and eights? Well, I got some of those too. Bottom line is this. You do not gamble with me....*unintelligible*...when you walk into a casino, when you want to gamble, the main thing you must do, is this, you must accept losing. I don't accept losing, and neither does Damien. Damien, my friend! My friend Damien is right here. *mumbles incoherently* You don't want to see this, do you? Let me show you something. I tell you what Anvil, go ahead and roll the dice. Mr. Cameraman, get your ass back up here. *getting angry* HELL-OOOO, I'm talkin' to you. Get that camera back up here. Thats what you should worry about Anvil. The bottom line is this, when the DDT comes, then the snake comes out. Worry about the DDT. DDT, DDT, DDT (begins yelling) DDT! DDT! DDT! *finally one of the 500 or so people in the audience chants along* THINK ABOUT IT!"

It's no perfect game, but to paraphrase James Cromwell: "That'll do, Snake. That'll do."


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